I have a nice voice.
Nice enough to enjoy singing in a choir or at church or camp. Nice enough to sing to my little boys at night and to lead song time or worship if I have to.
But my voice fails me if I myself am swept away in worship.
I know that singing isn't the only form of worship. Worship can be leading singing or teaching kindergarteners about how Jesus healed the paralytic. Worship can be sending a goat to a family overseas or cleaning the bathroom or walking the halls with a crying baby so that your family can sit in service. But sometimes worship is singing, and my voice fails me at those times. When the music and the words wrap around me and pull me out of myself and into that place where the glory of God seems suddenly near. When other people lift their voices or their hands in worship, I cannot. All I can muster in such a time is to mouth the words in silence and weep.
I suppose I could raise my hands and weep, but I cannot sing and I truly would like to.
And for me, that is what I imagine Heaven to be. I think that some day my voice will match the passion of my heart. When the glory of God comes near to me I will be able to open my mouth and worship with something other than silence and tears. When I finally step into Heaven I will have a voice capable of expressing all that is within me, even when I worship.
Psalm 116:12-13--"How can I repay the Lord for all His goodness to me? I will lift up the cup of salvation and call on the name of the Lord."